Rocket Launches from Cape Canaveral: What Happened and Why Bother?

Title: Two Falcon 9 Launches in One Day? Cool, I Guess. Wake Me When They Colonize Mars.

Okay, so SpaceX launched two Falcon 9 rockets in, like, three and a half hours. Big deal. I'm supposed to be impressed? We're talking about a company that's basically turned spaceflight into a glorified FedEx operation.

The details: One launch from Kennedy Space Center, the other from Cape Canaveral. Both slinging another batch of Starlink satellites into low Earth orbit. Yay. More space junk. More bandwidth for cat videos.

Here's a thought: Are we seriously just going to keep spamming the planet with these things? I mean, I get it, "internet for everyone" sounds great in a press release, but what about the long-term consequences? What about the light pollution screwing up astronomy? What about... well, never mind. Nobody cares.

Starlink: From Savior to Scourge?

Let’s be real, Starlink’s origin story was all about bringing connectivity to rural areas, right? The kind of places where Comcast fears to tread. Now it feels more like Musk is just building a digital empire in the sky. And how much is that monthly bill, anyway? I bet it ain't cheap.

And don't even get me started on the sheer number of these things. 8,900 operational satellites and counting? It's like he's playing a real-life version of Escape from Tarkov, except the loot is global internet dominance. Is there even any oversight on this? Or are we just trusting that a billionaire with a god complex will do the right thing?

Speaking of video games, I saw a Steam Machine gaming console at a garage sale the other day. What a complete waste of money that was. I wonder how many of those Starlink satellites will end up as space garbage in a few years. Probably about the same percentage as the Bret Michaels Show reruns I accidentally watched last night.

SpaceX did this before, by the way. They launched two Starlink missions 65 minutes apart back in 2024. So, offcourse, this isn’t even a new record or anything. SpaceX launches 2 rockets less than 4 hours apart from Florida's Space Coast (video) - Space

The Inevitable "Progress"

I know, I know. I sound like a grumpy old man yelling at a cloud. "Progress is progress!" they'll say. "You can't stop innovation!" But is it really innovative to just keep launching the same damn satellites over and over again? It feels more like... well, like watching the same Marvel movie for the tenth time.

And the fact that the boosters landed successfully on those drone ships? Yeah, yeah, reusable rockets. I get it. It saves money. But does it save the planet? Does it make the world a better place? Or does it just allow them to launch even more crap into orbit?

Honestly, I'm not sure what's more depressing: the relentless march of technology or the complete lack of imagination driving it.

Maybe I need a vacation. I hear the Blue Islands Airline has some good deals to... wait, never mind. I'd probably just end up staring at my phone the whole time, connected to the Starlink network.

So, What's the Point?

It's all just... pointless. We're so busy patting ourselves on the back for our technological "achievements" that we've completely lost sight of what actually matters. Colonizing Mars? Great. Fixing the problems here on Earth? Nah, too hard.